Every once in awhile you might wonder if you and your significant other jump in the sack enough, if quantity helps foster a deep loving relationship, or if its steamy enough… you want to know if you have a healthy sex life. I recently read an article over at prevention.com and would like to share some of the highlights. The following are good indicators you have a good and healthy sex life. If you are missing a few, don’t fret… it will give you something to work toward.
1. You feel good about your body.
“In a University of Texas study on women ages 18 to 49, those who scored highest on a body image scale were also the most sexually satisfied.”
2. You’re not afraid to ask for what you want (and he isn’t either).“Good sex is all about finding your perfect recipe,” says certified sex therapist Aline Zoldbrod, PhD, of SexSmart.com.
3. Sometimes you schedule it.
A lot of people feel like sex should arise from a spontaneous bout of lust. But that’s not always required. “Unless you’re living a life of leisure and your kids are grown and out of the house, I think scheduling sex is a good idea,” Zoldbrod says.
4. You’re not counting.
Whether you’re doing it a few times a week or once a month, focusing on a number isn’t a great way to assess your sex life, says Kristin Zeising, PsyD, a certified sex therapist in San Diego.
5. You like it.
“Do you feel closer to your partner afterwards? Are you in a better mood? Those are the questions that really have meaning,” Zoldbrod says.
6. You skip pity sex.
Zoldbrod says mercy sex is acceptable on occasion, but a steady diet of it can tank your libido by training your brain to think of sex as a chore.
7. You know when to change things up.
If you’re not enjoying it, chances are your partner can tell, according to a 2014 study from the University of Waterloo, in the UK… Although it requires a little extra effort, switching rooms or outfits or positions are all simple ways to make sex feel fresh again.
8. You’re happy together.
Relationship satisfaction fuels attraction, paving the way for better sex, the research suggests. So if you’re into your partner, your sex life is probably in good shape.
9. You’ve got a racy vocabulary.
Whether you’re sending a flirty text mid-day or whispering something into your partner’s ear, sexual banter is linked to greater sexual satisfaction for both men and women, per a 2011 study in the Journal of Integrated Social Sciences.
10. You don’t freak out about the occasional slow stretch.
“It’s important to have realistic ideas about what a healthy sex life is,” says Zeising. Namely, it won’t always be passionate and intense, and the frequency will ebb and flow throughout your relationship.
I just quoted the points that resonated with me the most. Read the full article here at prevention.com.